Namra on donkeys

My friend Namra, (previously mentioned in the post about FLAFF) is the author of this guest-post about donkeys.

Donkeys

I never liked Donkeys. They’re ugly and make the strangest noise; ”aaaaa iiiiii aaaaaa”. What do they think they’re saying when they make that noise? “Loooook at meeeee, I’m speeecial”, “Iiii’m a freak”! Actually, that sounds a bit like me…but, back to the point; donkeys are ugly, and I’m beautiful, and beautiful things don’t like ugly things. I don’t even like horses, so why the hell would I like donkeys, the horse-midget with bad skin?

On the other hand, I’m supposed to me a good person, and I shouldn’t hate ugly things just because they’re ugly, right? But donkeys are the only ugly things I hate. I know about tons of other ugly things that I don’t dislike. Like ugly people. I love ugly people. Or so called ugly people. I don’t think that anyone is ugly. I look at everybody as a piece of art. But when it comes to donkeys, I’m a cold hearted bitch. Or at least I was, until I watched this documentary on television. I only watched about five minutes of that documentary, but still, it changed my perspective on life, or on donkeys to be more exact.

It was about donkeys of course. A woman owned a donkey farm, where she took care of donkeys that were hurt. She tried to help donkeys that were being used in conflicts and wars. Palestinians would for example paint the flag on the ugly donkey, and the Israelis would answer this by throwing rocks on the donkey, or even putting fire on it. Some donkeys were also used as living bombs, like terrorists, almost. Putting bombs on the stupid little donkey, making it cross the borderline, before it exploded after screaming “aaaaaa iiiiiii aaaaaa”.

Poor little donkey! It’s not he’s fault that he is ugly. It really isn’t. It’s not his fault that he screams like a crazy maniac. It really isn’t. Or maybe he’s not ugly at all. Who are we to judge what is ugly and what is not. After this documentary I decided that the whole world was beautiful. Even dark men who have faces covered in hair. I think they’re called terrorists (even though all bearded men aren’t terrorists). Anyway, my point it, that from this day on, I will not judge donkeys. And I will use my entire life to help and save donkeys!

POWER TO THE DONKEYS!

Namra Saleem, the Starlet

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Eeva-Leena is sitting in a tree

Strange things are indeed happening in Wivenhoe Park. The story about Kim was something that happened a long time ago. A day after the dinosaur-incident, me and my Finnish friend Eeva-Leena went to the park to look for the remains of Kim.

We soon forgot what we were supposed to do there, and started climbing a tree instead. There were few, but thick branches to use. After a lot of sweating and swearing we reached a plateau quite high above the ground. The space was good enough for us both to rest, and so we did. We could see all the way to the lake where the ducks were swimming around trying to get to the breadcrumbs before the rats did. Despite of the nice view, and the spacious plateau, Eeva-Leena wasn’t satisfied. She thought that if we could go even higher up, there would be an even better view up there. “It is too far, and too dangerous” I said and started going down again. Eeva-Leena was not following. “I’m going further up.” She said. “But there are no branches left to climb.” I said. She just repeated “I’m going further up”. I knew there was no point in arguing against this Finn. (Finns are very stubborn.) So I left.

Two days after, on Monday, I didn’t see Eeva-Leena in lecture. Neither on Tuesday nor Wednesday. On Thursday, people started asking for her. Eventually I went looking for her in the park. As I had suspected, she was still there. In the tree. On the exact same spot as I had left her on Sunday. I said “Do you need help with coming down?” She said she didn’t need any help with a voice that sounded surprised and almost annoyed that I would even ask such a silly question, because she was obviously doing more than fine up here in the tree. She was planning on sitting there till the tree grew so high she would be able to see the roof of the library on the other side of the lake! I shook my head in despair and tried to put some sense into her. “You will starve! And if you don’t, you’ll die of loneliness or freeze to death!” But no, this Finn had a solution for everything. (Finns are also known for their practicality.) One of the gardeners had given her a sleeping bag, and people having barbecues and feeding the ducks in the lake, had given her sausages and stale bread.

I left her there, and two years after, the tree had grown so tall, I couldn’t visit her anymore. I finished my degree, and went back to my old country to work.

Eeva-Leena is still up there. Every year I go back to Wivenhoe Park during the summer break to visit her. I don’t think she is ever coming down. If you don’t believe me, go see for yourself. She is up in the tallest tree behind the duck lake. If you go to the top floor of the library and use binoculars to look, you might see a Finn up there. In the tallest tree in the park.

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A dinosaur ate my boyfriend

Something weird happened today. I was walking through Wivenhoe park. With Kim. Kim was talking about baseline-updating and google tracker, I wasn't listening. Suddenly the earth started shaking a little. Kim and I stopped. The leaves started rustling behind us, we turned around and guess what we saw? A huge dinosaur! I ran and ran and my heart was beating faster than ever. I looked over my shoulder as i ran and saw Kim frozed on the spot. The dinosaur picked him up like a paper-doll and bit of his head. Blood squirted out of his neck like in some bad splatter film. I was mortified. Next, the dinosaur started chewing his arms. I passed out.

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Janteloven, or “the law of Jante” was first mentioned in a novel written by the Danish author Aksel Sandemose.

Don’t think you’re anything special or better than us

is the basic rule underlying all the ten rules in the law. The law was, not “invented” by Sandemose. Rather, he put the social norms that were common to live by in small places in Denmark and Norway (and still is) into words. The thing is, that if you come from a small place where everyone knows everyone, it is hard to develop independently, because you will always want to conform into the society that you live in. It feels “safe” to follow the rules, because people won’ talk about you behind your back.

In society in general there will always be a douche bag who thinks he knows who you are better than you do yourself. If you change in one way or another, the douche bag will say you are “pretending to be someone you’re not”. But nobody can decide who you are but yourself.

To reach ones fullest potential it's important to acknowledge your own success. This must not be mistaken with arrogance. Just because you are proud of who you are does not mean that you think you're better than others. I think that in order to achieve this, we should always keep an open mind, and feel joy and inspiration over other peoples success. We should be proud and happy of who we are and what we achieve!

I love it when people can admit to be good at something. And I like it when people can take a compliment with a smile instead of shaking it off. If I give you a compliment, and your reply is "no, that's not true. I look like a shit head today" for instance, that means that you are calling me a lier. and i'm not, because if you know me, you know I (usually) tell the truth.

So the new rule is:

You are special. Let others be special too.

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NOTHING

Nothing to write about

Is it because I have emptied all the content in my brain previously in this blog? (my last blog entry wasn’t even written by myself, I just copied and pasted something hC andersen wrote from the internet). well at least i drew that drawing myself if that helps

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The princess and the pea, by H. C. Andersen

Once upon a time there was a prince who wanted to find a princess, but she would have to be a real princess. So he traveled all around the world to find one, but there was always something wrong. There were princesses enough, but he could never be sure that they were real ones. There was always something about them that was not quite right. So he came home again and was sad, for he so much wanted to have a real princess.

One evening there was a terrible storm. It thundered and lightninged! The rain poured down! It was horrible! Then there was a knock at the city gate, and the old king went out to open it.

A princess was standing outside. But my goodness, how she looked from the rain and the weather! Water ran down from her hair and her clothes. It ran into the toes of her shoes and out at the heels. And yet she said that she was a real princess.

"Well, we shall soon find that out," thought the old queen. But she said nothing, went into the bedroom, took off all the bedding and laid a pea on the bottom of the bed. Then she took twenty mattresses and laid them on the pea, and then twenty featherbeds of eiderdown on top of the mattresses.

That was where the princess was to sleep for the night. In the morning she was asked how she had slept.

"Oh, horribly!" she said. "I hardly closed my eyes all night. Goodness knows what there was in the bed! I was lying on something hard, so that I am black and blue all over my body. It is horrible!"

Now they could see that she was a real princess, because she had felt the pea right through the twenty mattresses and the twenty featherbeds. Nobody but a real princess could be that sensitive.

So the prince took her for his wife, because now he knew that he had a real princess. And the pea was put in the art gallery where it can still be seen, unless someone has taken it.

H. C. Andersen

Things that makes me cry

Things that makes me cry

• Nicolas Nickleby by Charles Dickens is such a heart-breaker.

• The way that animals such as minks and foxes are treated in the fur industry makes me angry. They live under poor conditions and are killed by getting beaten to death(!), drowned or electrocuted.

• I feel so sorry for the women who has to sell their bodies to loser-assholes who can't get laid the normal way. What annoys me the most about this, is when the loser-assholes actually believes that the women prostitute themselves by choice, and that they like it! I cant even try to imagine how horrible and degrading it must feel to pretend to like it, so that the asshole can finish off his business as quikly as possible, to make the suffering stop.

• Unfortunately, slavery is not a thing of the past. Human trafficking between eastern-european, asian and african countries and rich western countries is as common as snot in the first grade.

• War is wrong. Instead of solving a problem, war creates new ones.

• Oprah Winfrey show. (Don't tell anyone)

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things that make me laugh

I haven't written in a week now. The reason for that is because i haven't had anything to write about, and because i haven't been in blogging mood lately. I don't really have anything good to write about today either, so I'll just tell you about things that make me laugh.

• Amanda Buttcrack in a trolley: http://www.facebook.com/video/video.php?v=18828895067&subj=597306351

• this picture---->

i didn't even make that face on purpose

• The time Cathrine Knutsen told a funny (in her opinion) story in a family dinner, and she laughed so much it almost killed her, but as she looked up, she discovered she was the only one laughing of the 15 people who were present. Everybody just looked at her as if she was a retard. -- I thought about that story every time i passed that BIG hanging birch outside my secondary school. ( which was every school day for three years, and if I laughed for one minute every time, i laughed 5days x 42 weeks x 3years = 10 hours of that story)

• that day (also in secondary) Susanne and Anette, the foxy, monozygotic twins had their bithday and my friend Cecilie asked me WHICH OF THE TWINS BIRTHDAY IT WAS. Ahahha

• My mom is not a particularly funny person, at least never on purpose. But today she wrote me an e mail telling me how sorry she was that she always made me and my sister dress up as witches in fancy dress parties and carnivals. (All the other girls were princesses and angels.) that makes me laugh. (although it didn't when I was seven)
  

• Anything that has to do with fart and poop. I am actually laughing right now just of writing the word.

• That time my anonymous friend's boyfriend woke up in the middle of the night by a dripping sound and found my friend peeing in a drawer. When he confronted her, she (still sleepwalking) hid behind the bed!

• Stuart in mad tv.

• just after my grandmothers coffin had been lowered down into a hole in the ground and everyone was standing around looking into the hole with sad thoughts in their heads, my dads cellphone rang. it was very hard to keep my face serious.
  

• The performance sledgers who sledge as they protest against the wrongs in the society. http://youtube.com/watch?v=tgqxfZPTRSw

this stupid bitch--------------------->